The Days Are Long, But The Years Are Short

It’s crazy just how fast time flies. The last time I posted anything was six months ago…but it doesn’t feel that long! And you know what’s even more crazy?! I’ve been writing this post for days already to insure that I actually post it in time for Maeva’s birthday. Life is chaotic and it seems as though we are always so busy. But busy with what? What is consuming all of my time?

With Maeva’s birthday this week, I’ve been reflecting on the last four years, especially her birth and when she was a baby. We bought a phone charger for our older smart phones and I discovered all kinds of pictures and videos from when she was a baby. Unfortunately, we lost all the videos and photos of her birth since our computer crashed from a power outage. I was especially upset to lose them since she was born via c-section and I obviously didn’t get to see much. Everything that was taken in the OR is gone. So a lot of my memories of her right when she was born, were those lost videos and photos.

Maeva was born 13 days after her due date. Our Summer solstice baby! My pregnancy definitely could’ve been worse, but it wasn’t exactly a walk in the park either. I was anemic (explains my constant craving for steak and lemonade) and I had multiple bladder infections and yes, I had morning sickness with her…started right at 6 weeks and lasted through week 14. I would get sick on the bus on my way to work or even brushing my teeth. Miserable. Then at the end, I was getting preeclampsia so my midwife eventually made the call of inducing naturally. We tried all sorts of things then finally took castor oil to get things rolling on Thursday night. Friday morning, we went to the hospital as contractions started to get closer. My goal was to go without an epidural and I lasted 24 hours naturally. Everything was going well and things were progressing in good time. We had Ryan’s grandfather playing soothing acoustic guitar to help me relax as I labored in the water and after a few hours, I was at 8cm. I was getting excited and feeling positive that I could do this! But circumstances didn’t end up in our favor. From that point, we discovered she was face up (the midwife had to go in with her hand and turn her…with no epidural. Ryan almost fainted…it was awful!) her heart rate had plummeted and after several hours, I still wasn’t fully dilated. I wasn’t ever allowed to push since I got stuck at 9 cm and had to breathe through every contraction. FOR 12 HOURS!!! I. Was. Wiped. So I finally gave in for an epidural. And 6 hours later when her heart rate plummeted a second time, a c-section had to happen. I was terrified. Ryan was terrified. Everyone was tired and worried…but she was perfect. Weighing in at 7 pounds, 14 ounces on Saturday morning. What a trek!! After 5 days in the hospital, I was more than ready to go home. Recovering from a c-section is no fun…but I’m certainly glad we both ended up alright in the end. After her birth, I knew I wanted the next birth experience to be different…because that was rough!

We totally got lucky because she was the best baby. Great sleeper right from the start, so sweet and calm and so smart!! She was standing at 7 months and waited a whole 3 months before she started walking (on Mother’s Day) and within days she had walked the length of the gym. Her first word was Papa (go figure) and she was such a happy girl and well behaved. We were so in love with her! Since I was speaking to her in French, we also tried teaching her some baby sign language to help bridge the gap for communication with us. She caught on so fast! It was so easy! So smart! What a cutie baby she was. She was so much fun!!! Until about two and a half…then she started getting more difficult.

From two and a half to now, “tricky” is an understatement. It’s true, three years old was WAY harder than two. Tantrums, talking back, learning habits, and the concept of listening. She is great at standing her ground, I’ll give her that. But she also really knows how to drive us nuts. I know, it won’t get any easier either (heaven help me). This girl is a firecracker. So independent, strong-willed, and determined to do everything her way. She says exactly what she thinks…all the time, all day long. Although she may be stubborn, she is also a wonderful helper. Baking, cleaning, helping with her brother, tasks around the house (except cleaning her room and toys…how convenient), she always wants to be involved. Now that her brother is a little older, she is starting to play with him alone, but she still loves being right there with all of us. Ryan jokes and says, “you have the whole house to play in and you have to be right here?! We might as well live in a Tiny House since we are always all together.” Ha! That’ll change as the years pass. Guaranteed. But for now, she’ll always be where her Papa is. She has always been a daddy’s girl and the bond they have is amazing to witness. The second he leaves for work, she will look at me with tears in her eyes and say, ” I miss Papa. I love him.” Honestly child. Bedtime? Papa is always requested first. But you know what? Ryan is so in love with his little girl. It literally makes my heart melt. Then on the other hand, She is so outgoing and will talk to anyone. For real. There is no stranger danger with her. She definitely got that from her dad. She wasn’t always like that though. For a while when she was just learning to talk, she was super shy. She’d just look at everyone who came up to her and she’d just stare at them. Then, like the flip of a switch, out of nowhere, she just came out of her shell and started chatting up a storm and turned into this total social bug! Now there’s no stopping her. Ever.

Her personality is gold and she is teaching us every day. Her honesty is uncanny and she sure can make us laugh. She tests her boundaries (and our patience) constantly. She loves playing with other kids and she absolutely loves her brother and he loves her right back. She is so protective over him and sensitive that if he cries, she gets worried and sometimes cries with him. She will always ask where he is when she walks in the door or if he’s napping. Their connection is so strong and they have a blast together (despite the obvious fights). She definitely knows who her family is and her love runs deep. Such an amazing quality that I certainly hope she will carry along with her throughout her life. I see so much of both Ryan and I in her and it’s kinda scary! So much pressure and responsibility on us as adults to raise our children right. Whatever “right” means!

In the end, there’s a lot I can complain about. Every parent does. But there are so many more good things that outweigh the bad! Every day seems so long yet here we are, wondering where the last 4 years have gone! And despite all the rough patches, I can’t help but smile as I reminisce because she means the world to me. She gave me the role of mother. Forever bonded as family. Forever my baby girl. I look forward to her standing in the window as I leave for work to wave and blow me a kiss. Those are the moments I treasure. No matter how much I say I love you, I will always love you more than that. Happy Birthday, Maeva Lynn!